As I sit in the hospital watching my dad as the nurses and doctors come and go I wonder what he is thinking. My dad has a tumor on his brain that is causing seizures and short term memory loss. I think he has to know something is wrong but his memory won’t let him remember what that is. I thank God for that. It breaks my heart to see such a vibrant man a few months ago be so lost.
My dad served in the Navy and supported seven kids through some tough times.
He is a great man of faith in God. He knows that God is watching over him. My mom told me yesterday that he is not afraid of dying and that he knows where he is going. What a great reminder of where our faith should be. That we should not be afraid of death or any other worldly enemy or disease.
I thank God for all the lessons that my Dad has taught me. Even today as I watch him I see lessons. You smile and laugh even in the worst of times.
One thing for sure he is surrounded by family.
This is week has gone by so fast. Where did the time go? Which is what I was thinking Thursday night while watching Jon’s niece graduate from High School. She graduated with Honors and we are so proud.
Me, Kc and Jon 2013
Where did the time go? I still remember my High School Graduation. I was so excited to get out and start real life or so I thought. Saying goodbye to my friends was not easy but the sense of freedom was new and exciting.
Tracy, Martha, Me and April 1987
Martha,Tracy, Me and April 2012
But boy did life have other plans for me. I did not go to college, instead I wanted the freedom. I wanted the job. I wanted to get out of my parents house, I wanted to make my own money, spend time with friends and yes party a little too. My ideas of real life were let’s say a little askew. Two years later I was married, a mother of a precious little girl and pregnant with my second child. Two years after that, I was newly divorced and a single mom to two beautiful children. Life had other plans for me indeed. I struggled as a single mom, worked long hours and missed very important days with my children. I made many mistakes that I will have to live with for the rest of my life, but I would not change one single thing in my life. It made me the strong person I am today. It brought me back to God and the meaning of family and God brought me Jon.
A few things I would like to tell KC on this day is to stay true to yourself, go to college and find out who you are. Study hard and look at this time as a new chapter in your life, one of many. Don’t rush into the next chapter of your life it will come soon enough. Enjoy this time of your life and treasure the small things as much as the big ones. Call your mother and tell her you love her any chance you get. It means the world to her. Always remember we are here for you and you are not alone.
I had a bad week last week. I won’t go into detail but my patience with people was very thin and it was hard to stay to true to myself and be the Christian I want to be. I was placed in a situation at work that required a lot of patience. Let’s just say I am not sure I handled it the way God wanted me to. But after the situation which seemed to drag on for days I read a Joyce Meyer devotional that seem to hit me right between the eyes. I just wish I would of read this before I had the situation at hand. Here is her devotional that I read.
“Walk with Boldness
Some people exude boldness, while others struggle with living boldly as a loved child of God. I had that problem until God showed me some important keys that helped me live boldly, and I want to share them with you.
1. Refuse to live in fear. Fear is an epidemic in our society. The Bible instructs us in Hebrews 10:38 to live by faith and not draw back in fear.
2. Put setbacks behind you. You are not a failure because you try new things and they don’t work out. You fail only when you stop trying. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes, and if you do, recover quickly and press on.
3. Don’t draw comparisons. Boldness will be impossible as long as you compare yourself to others. Boldness comes from accepting who you are and being the best you can be.
4. Be willing to take action. Search your heart and ask yourself what you believe God wants you to do, and then do it.
Pray over these four keys, and ask the Holy Spirit to help you live them out. Hold up your head and be filled with boldness.”
Joyce Meyer Devotional
I come to realize that everyday God puts us in situations where we can show his true love. I am taking last week as a learning lesson. I am ready for the week ahead, ready to face my giants and hold my head up and be filled with boldness. I am prepared for the week ahead.
I had a very productive weekend which helped me work out some of the problems rolling around in my head. My garden and flower pots are now planted. I planted my green peppers, Jalepeno peppers, Basil and Thai Basil, Dill, Sage and Rosemary. I also planted two cherry tomato plants in pots. Now it is time to sit and wait for the produce. I truly believe gardening is good for the spirit and the soul. Here are some pictures of what my mental healing produced this weekend.